Grumpy

Grumpy
The man who started it all

Monday, July 7, 2008

Shampoo - latest post by Matt

Okay, maybe it's just me, but I've just got out of the bath.

Why, oh why, do the manufacturers of hair shampoo choose to label their products with minute typefaces on illegible backgrounds?

How many times must I wash my hair with toilet duck before these 'bozos' decide to label their hair products so that your average Johnny can read them! - without wearing glasses or contact lenses?

Most of us enter the bath or shower, sans-eyewear and I'm sure many like me have to guess what they maybe putting on their hair in the way of shampoo.
Many's a time that I've come out smelling of bleach or worse and once or twice with completely different coloured hair!

What the fuck is wrong with these people and their graphic designers in particular. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for good design, but good design means good communication as well as nice 'colours and interesting type> faces' !!!

grump / mumble / mumble / grump grump

good night

Matt

Thursday, July 3, 2008

Internet Chain Letters

A brilliant letter, supposedly written by the 'Big Yin', forwarded to me by Mr. Matthew Alexander - BTW if yo wish to see examples of Matthew's wonderful paintings: www.matthew-alexander.com

The letter:

Hello, my name is Billy and I suffer from guilt for not forwarding 50 billion fucking chain letters sent to me by people who actually believe, if you send them on, a poor six-year-old girl in Scotland with a breast on her forehead will be able to raise enough money to have it removed before her redneck parents sell her to a travelling freak show.

And, do you honestly believe that Bill Gates is going to give $1000 to you, and everyone to whom you send 'his' email?

How stupid are we?

Ooooh, looky here! If I scroll down this page and make a wish, I'll get laid by a model I just happen to run into the next day!

What a bunch of bullshit. Maybe the evil chain letter leprechauns will come into my house and sodomise me in my sleep for not continuing a chain letter that was started by St Peter in 5AD and brought to this country by midget pilgrim stowaways on the Endeavour.

Fuck 'em!!

If you're going to forward something, at least send me something mildly amusing. I've seen all the 'send this to 10 of your closest friends, and this poor, wretched excuse for a human being will somehow receive a nickel from some omniscient being' forwards about 90 times. I don't fucking care.

Show a little intelligence and think about what you're actually contributing to by sending out these forwards. Chances are, it's our own unpopularity.

The point being? If you get some chain letter that's threatening to leave you shagless or luckless for the rest of your life, delete it.

If it's funny, send it on. Don't piss people off by making them feel guilty about a leper in Botswana with no teeth who has been tied to the arse of a dead elephant for 27 years and whose only salvation is the 5 cents per letter he'll receive if you forward this email.

Now forward this to everyone you know. Otherwise, tomorrow morning your underwear will turn carnivorous and will consume your genitals.

Have a nice day.

Billy Connolly

PS Send me 15 bucks and then fuck off.